The Italian Secret to Great Sex
By: Deanna Kizis

Self
Oct 2008

Keep Romance Carefree Without a Trip to Italy

1. Exercise Your Imagination- Free your mind and your libido will follow!  “Allowing yourself to delve into your fantasies will open your sexual experience”, says Gina Ogden, Ph.D., author of The G Spot and Other Discoveries About Human Sexuality (Holt Paperbacks), the trick is to give yourself permission to conjure any images that put you in the mood, regardless of how kinky they may seem.  “Many people fear their fantasies, because they’re afraid that thinking something means you actually want to do it.  That’s not true”, Whipple explains.

2. Take Time to Unwind- “Stress is the leading cause of diminished sexual desire”, says Ava Cadell, a sex therapist in Los Angeles.  “It lowers testosterone, which is responsible for sex drive, and releases a chemical reaction in your body that restricts blood flow and makes arousal and orgasm difficult.”  What to do if your workload won’t let up?  “Anything that makes you feel better mentally and physically:  Get a massage, write down your feelings, take deep breaths, listen to music”, Cadell advises.  And try to steer clear of anxiety-elevating caffeine and depressing news on television before you hit the sheets, says Arthur Wisot, M.D., a reproductive medical specialist and fertility expert at Reproductive Partners in Los Angeles.  “Sex occurs 90 percent in the head and 10 percent in the genitals”, Dr. Wisot says.

3. Raise Your Heart Rate- A candlelit dinner is lovely, but you’ll get more bang for your buck with an activity that sends your heart racing, because anything that stimulates adrenaline increases desire and the ability to have an orgasm.  “When you get really excited, your body craves more of that feeling”, Cadell says.  Get a jump start by watching action flicks, doing a Tae-Bo video or riding a roller coaster.

4. Throw Down the Gauntlet- Lace up your sneaks and create a little healthy rivalry!  Physical competition may increase women’s testosterone levels, according to researchers at Emory University in Atlanta.  Translation:  When you challenge your partner to a race around the track, chances are the hormone surge will make you want to end up in the sack.  “A little friendly power struggle can be a great form of foreplay”, Cadell says. -Ingela Ratledge