the mission: how to achieve the ultimate orgasm
Submissions: Impossible the mission: how to achieve the ultimate orgasm
By: Michele Zipp
Challenge the adventurous editors of PLAYGIRL to test drive your wildest whims and kinkiest curiosities! Go ahead, we dare you.
Sex Command Central: Good morning, Playgirls. I have a mission for you. Kerry from Scottsdale, AZ writes, “I’ve read about womem having these mind-blowing orgasms and I question their claims. While I can orgasm just fine, I wouldn’t call it mind-blowing. Am I missing something?”
Yes and no. Some women havedifficulty having any kind of orgasm, so Kerry, consider yourself lucky. But other women can boast having incredible bliss from the experience the French call “le petit mort,” translated as “the little death.” Sounds mind-blowing, doesn’t it?
Embarking On Ecstasy
I went to the best, Dr. Ava Cadell, world-renowned sexologist, who was offering a quickie course on achieving the ultimate orgasm. But a quickie in the sack, this is not
Dr. Cadell was a Hungarian war orphan raised by nuns. She late acquired a Ph.D. in Philosophy in Human Behavior from Newport University, California and also a Doctorate of Education in Human Sexuality in San Fransisco. She’s a Board Certified Clinical Sexologist and Hypnotherapist, and maintains a private practice in Los Angeles. She has authored many books with the mission of promoting the benefits of healthy and loving sex to individuals and couples around the globe. So, if anyone can teach us how to put more power in our passion, it’s Dr. Cadell.
Fruit Roll Ups… And Downs
The seminar, for women only, took place in a posh hotel in Manhattan. Dr. Cadell gave us each a banana as we were taking our seats on the plush couches. But we were instructed not to eat them. In a big candy bowl were an assortment of flavored condoms. “Take one of those too,” she said. I chose strawberry, thank goodness. The woman next to me chose chocolate and later said it tasted worse than a non-flavored rubber. When the very cute and young male waiters came up to deliver some fresh coffee, they blushed at all us ladies sitting around with bananas and condoms. Most of us were commenting on the different sized bananas we were holding- some much larger than others- while waiting for Dr. Cadell to shed some light on sex. I knew we were in for some fun.
Always stressing safe sex, Dr. Cadell started by telling us to unwrap the condom and put it in our mouth with the tip against our tongue. She then showed us how to roll the condom down our lover’s (in this case our banana’s) shaft. A sexy way to enhance a not so sexy moment. Yes, the strawberry flavor was good, but nothing I’d want to suck on all day. Some of us were prouder than others at our skill in this technique, and I have to say that I did pretty damn good- a must try!
Next, Dr. Cadell got right to the point: the key to the ultimate orgasm is three. Three what? The result of arousing three points of pleasure simultaneously is the trigasm- the ultimate orgasm. Three fingers? Three times? A threesome? What does she mean?
It’s all about you- the three points of pleasure are the clitoris, the G-spot, and the anus. To those of you who are sensitive to any backdoor parties, please don’t fret. Dr. Cadell told us that the nerve-endings, or pleasure producing spots, of the anus, can be stimulated by rubbing the outside- a feather can even do the trick. Some women prefer stimulation only about an inch in, and others like it further. Find out what is best for you.
The trigasm, as she calls it, can be acieved solo or with a vibrator or with a partner. Start off by massaging your clit up and down, side to side, with one finger almost to the point of no return. Then move inward to caress your G-spot with your forefinger making that “come-hither” motion. (For more info on how to find your G-spot see our past feature in March 2002.) Then stimulate your anus ( to steer clear of bacteria, be sure not to use the same finger you used for anal stimulation anywhere else.) Once, you’ve worked yourself into a frenzy in each of these areas, use a finger or all three at the same time for your incredible trigasmic finish.
If you introduce toys into your solo exploration, try anal beads or a butt plug, and a double-headed vibrator (to reach G-spot and clit) or just your favorite dildo to get you to the crest of pleasure.
With a partner, you can get creative too. If his tongue, penus, fingers or even just him blowing on your anus can take you to the trigasm- do it. But to reach the plateau, be sure to satisfy your other two “gasms” with toys or any of the aforementioned body parts that may not be in use.
“I have been teach a combination of simultaneous G-spot and clitoral stimulation to couples for years.” Dr. Ava Cadell told us after teaching the technique, “but I wanted women to experience more, I wanted women to have the very best. So, here’s the revolution, the trigasm!”
Here are some other tips are you go on your trigasm exploration: Begin with sensitivity and intensify the mood by stimulating all five senses. Be creative by using sensual sound and visual arousal. When with a partner, feel his heat, be aware of his scent, and taste. Also, tell your lover to take up juggling, because he is going to need to work on his coordination to master this technique, but it’s well worth the effort and obviously pleasure while learning.
Well, that was an understatement! I couldn’t wait to get home so I could whip out my notes (and vibrator) and follow Dr. Cadell’s advice. I’ve always enjoyed the build-up of an orgasm only to stop and have me wanting more, but trying that technique on three points of pleasure made for (and I’m understating) the ultimate orgasm.
Solo satisfaction was a given, but I knew it would take some coaxing to get the man to go down there “juggling” my three on-the-verge-gasms to the finish line. After I mastered in myself, I told my boyfriend about the intense pleasure I gave myself and he was eager to up my solo O. Plus he was really turned on by my expertise in no-hands, only mouth condom placement. If you have ever been shy about introducing sex toys into your menage a deux, now is the time to get over it. His tongue will not last long enough to get your clit to come in colors for this build-up of beauty. Have the vibrator ready and his lick can enhance it. And for you gals who love oral as much (if not more) than sex, realized that while he’s bringing you toward ecstacy, he’s going there too. All work and no play makes your man an explodable toy.
“My personal ultimate orgasm is the trigasm,” says Dr. Cadell. “It may or may not be yours, but I hope you have fun finding out. As Mae West said, ‘Too much of a good thing is wonderful.’ ”
Dr. Cadell’s Five Steps to Bliss (Give these tips to your lover)
1. Step One: Have her lie back while you lavish her clitoris with oral pleasure until she has reached a level 8 on a pleasure scale of 1 to 10.
2. Step Two: Change course and stimulate her vulva in small circles with the tongue or fingers for a couple of minutes.
3. Step Three: Return to that little button on nerves and orally extend her level of pleasure to a 9, almost to the point of no return.
4. Step Four: At this peak, insert your forefinger palm up into her vagina and find her G-spot, then tap, tap, tap it gently towards her navel.
5. Step Five: Simultaneously with step four, you must stimulate her anus gently with a feather, your pinky, or a vibrator to bring your partner to a mind blowing, earth shattering, energy-melting orgasm.